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| Wednesday, 22-Mar-2006 01:22 |
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it came and w e n t.....
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Man... how time flies...
What's even worse, is that I have nothing to show for it...
Hmm... maybe I should rephrase that sentence.
I do have things to show... I've graduated, got my degree.
Got a job with a good, but flawed, company. I definitely enjoying my time here.
Despite all the mishaps that had happened to the family, they are all healthy
Alhamdulillah, all around.
Thank God for all the blessings and advantages that God has given to me.
But being the lil ungrateful insignificant speck of life that I am, I wish there was more.
What more? Since I do have more than a lot of people have.
I can go all psychological with the reasons...
But let's not go down that route.
Perhaps it is because I see my peers and see that theyhave developed and extend themselves, more and more.
When I look at them, it feels like I'm seeing them from behind and some of them do have niice behinds....hahaha
I feel like I am not reaching my potential...
I am not being out there and experiencing things I feel that I should be...
Maybe it's all in my head.
Maybe once, I'll know what I want, I'll get it....
Whatever, man...
Life is too busy to worry about what ifs and what would happensss....
But I should definitely take time to make things happen in my life...
I should do things that I would never ever do,
Like telling the person that I fancy him.... 
perhaps....
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| Friday, 6-Jan-2006 00:00 |
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pix: a day before n e w y e a r...
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Here are some pix of my new year's eve celebration... 
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| Tuesday, 3-Jan-2006 00:00 |
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day before the n e w y e a r ....
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Hmm... as I had dinner to celebrate the new years with my friends. I was swamped with feeling of doubts.
Self doubt more specifically.
I hate when that happens because self doubt is such an odious emotion/attitude.
So I started my celebration for the new year feeling ambigious, unsure and sure as hell as unhappy with the thoughts that decided to perambulate at that moment.
Though I still managed to enjoy my dinner and the subsequent firework celebration, it was...I was pensive.
So, as I was trying to deal with the things that is working through my mind, I took a lot of pictures especially my two friends who happen to a couple. They look adorable together. Looking at them, assuaged some of the panic and the distress but they were also the catalyst for the self doubt.
Don't worry, babes. It was not your fault, you just reminded me of something...that was all.
Hell of a way to start the new year huh...
To Be Continued...
I'll put some pictures later, insya'allah
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| Friday, 30-Dec-2005 00:00 |
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revelations...
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garfield...
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...karupin...
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..so kawaii
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hmm... the end of the year...already??!!
so far the end of year seem to make people be weird or feel weird or even perhaps feel that they should do something, anything just before the year ends.
i know i have been acting like that...<heh> though I have to add that my behaviour is not as drastic as some other people.
I have a reputation of being a kepochi <a busy body lor hahaha>, though I feel like my bother's reputation of being one seems to make mine even bigger that usual. Anyways, me being a kepo always "allow" me to be in the position of hearing many things...good & bad, beautiful & ugly, brilliant & stupid, exciting & boring, "the unheard of" as well as the commonplace.
But there always comes a time, where I feel that something should not be told especially to the likes of me. I, too, have scruples even if it seems hard to believe. I have my own standards that I adhere to (well most of the times). There are somethings that ARE personal. I am perfectly aware of that. I would neverpush.
But when it happens anyways...
I usually do not know what to do. The ramifications of the information told would just scroll through my mind at high speed.
and I'll be thinking, "why are you telling me this", "what's the purpose".
I suppose sometimes somethings are too big for a mind to hold it in.
Sometimes you just want someone to listen to you....just because
to share...
to let go...
to relieve...
Who knows what goes through a person's mind when the urge to tell someone about something... something that was or still is kept close to heart, bears weight in one's mind and hold great importance to one's soul.
<heh> Life is about Living and Living is all about Feeling. Feeling involves you feel shitty at one mo and the wonderful the next.
Life is crazy... so people, enjoy it to the max. For without the bad, does the good have any meaning?
Happy new year and I hope that y'all be better persons for that would help to make this world a better place.
Final sign off for the year~
Ja ne
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| Wednesday, 21-Dec-2005 00:00 |
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A cup for t h o u g h t ....
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| Quote: | A group of working adults got together to visit their University lecturer.
The Lecturer was happy to see them. Conversation soon turned into
complaints about stress in work and life.
The Lecturer just smiled and went to the kitchen to get an assortment of
cups - some porcelain, some in plastic, some in glass, some plain looking
and some looked rather expensive and exquisite.
The Lecturer offered his former students the cups to get drinks for
themselves.
When all the students had a cup in hand with water, the Lecturer spoke:
"If you noticed, all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken up,
leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal that you
only want the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems
and stress. What all you wanted was water, not the cup, but we
unconsciously went for the better cups."
"Just like in life, if Life is Water, then the jobs, money and position in
society are the cups. They are just tools to hold/maintain Life, but the
quality of Life doesn't change."
"If we only concentrate on the cup, we won't have time to enjoy/taste
the water in it." |
Story by Unknown
Thanks to Radziah for emailling the story to me
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| Thursday, 15-Dec-2005 00:00 |
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<golden oldies>
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Last night I went to a retirees' night out ( aka dinner la). It struck me how different that generation is to mine...that is not even mentioning the apparent generation gap.
I'm not even sure if I am to define the difference but that generation, or at least the retirees at that dinner, have such auras around them. Perhaps I'm an ageist but with the age group in that hall (between 55 - 82 years old), I did not expect that they would have such fierce/strong auras. It was quite dazzling to be in their company (but the dinner was boring, as dinners always are).
But another way of looking at it would be that people in my generation do not possess such auras. I personally have not been in the presence of anyone (in my generation) that possess dazzling aura. It could be the age thing that the older you become, the more experience you gain, the more it shapes you.
Who knows...but I would like to have the ability to struck someone with my dazzling aura...hahaha
Maybe when I am old and wrinkly, I would have developed that ability....
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| Wednesday, 14-Dec-2005 00:00 |
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colleagues... <well, some of them>
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I have to say that, with all the chaos that whirling around me, I do have interesting bands of colleagues.
Here are pictures of some of them.
These are people that I work with, constantly.
It has been, and continue to be, enlightening to see how all these characters work/mesh/respond with each other.
If you guys are reading this, don't worry... there is nothing, I swear. <hahaha>
Well, there has not been a dull moment working with them...that i can divulge...hahaha...
For me personally, they have broaden and increase my perspective in many ways....that's always a good thing.
Signing off~
Ja ne
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| Monday, 5-Dec-2005 00:00 |
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konnichiwa....
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Welll...it has been ages, dahling...
Loads of things happened, some good, some bad, some hectic, some suicidal <on other ppl's part>.
My life has become more interesting and hectic. Sometimes it is a wonder that I do not drown under all of the excitements and thrills.
My life after my studies, is weird. But than again all of Life's transitions (at least mine) are often shrouded in uncertainities and weirdness. It's been about 3 months since I came back to my homeground and for me to just realise that it has only been 3 freaking months <??!!> and with the level of upheavalness in my life...
No wonder...no wonder things have been psychotic.
Sorry still in shock of the three months thingy... bloody hell. With the amount of injuries, scrapes and bruises <physically, emotionally and mentally> that I have collected, I seriously thought that I have been back for at least 6 months!!!
Life is crazy that way and I guess I have reflect back on the months passed and get back on the right dimension... The affects of stress on the mind's ability to handle stress is amazing... Subhanallah
The picture above was taken during the Eid celebration... it was the last night of Ramadhan and I am happy to say that I celebrated it with the whole of my family... and in that, it made me miss someone even more, as that individual would have loved, appreciated and enjoyed this celebration with the family even more.
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| Wednesday, 5-Oct-2005 00:00 |
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....r a m a d h a n.... <ouch!>
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Assalamulaikum... alhamdulillah that month of Ramadhan has come along. So Muslims worldwide would perform the ibadah and reap the benefits that comes along with this holy month, insya'allah.
Last night some muslims might have prepared for the first day of fasting (today!) but preparing some food for sahur (for most women and maybe some men) or at least setting the alarm clock earlier than usually so that one can wake up and have a drink of water before imsak.
But yours truly, prepared her first day of Ramadhan by spraining her ankle (badly i might add) and spend the whole time at night groaning and moaning from the pain <sigh> v. v. painful 
Woah...sedih betul I.
But now I have something to look forward to <as well as push the pain off my thoughts>, buying something seriously delicious in pasar Ramadhan. 
.::back to work::.
.....:::::::~SeLaMaT bErPuAsA & SeLaMaT bErBuKa PuAsA~::::::.....
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| Monday, 3-Oct-2005 00:00 |
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back in business but not completely....
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Konnichiwa or Oniohsayyo...hehe
Hello people, how are you? Hope you guys are doing what you usually do plus doing something special sometimes.
Life have been busy, hectic, chaotic, tiring, you name it i'm in the midst of it. Furthermore sorry for the lack of activity in this page...no broadband = no upload = no pictures. I hope to rectify the situation soon, insya'allah, let see how things go, aight.
I have a lot of pictures to put up, so I hope to be back in business completely soon.
Take care
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